Near Death Experience

Well, it's been a while since I've written but you know how it is. Things happen, things change, new routines develop then all of a sudden you realize what should be most important in life has been put on the back burner.

One thing not on the backburner is love. At least on my side :). It's been an absolute happy time and I want the future to continue to grow and become even happier. I have very hopeful feelings about it all :)

The "near death experience" that I was referring to is the stagnant position we tend to settle into through work, life, our personal growth, etc. Think back of how many years we may have been telling ourselves "some day I will write a book about..", or "My talents in jewelry making could become such a successful business if only I..", or "with a little effort and getting a few classes out of the way a job change is within my reach..." It's not an unreachable task, none of those are unreachable tasks. It just takes taking the steps forward. And not just one step, many steps, perhaps some side stepping, backtracking, but any change has to start out with the first step.

Without taking a first step to get out of a rut we risk putting blame on other things for our own predicament. There is a talent in multitasking but if piling so much on your plate is a way hiding from doing what you want to do, then prioritize. The things that matter must come to the forefront. Love in life, love of life, love of family, love of spirit, those are the things that matter. Those are the things that matter. Not putting off a job change because it's the stable thing to to do. Make a change that will lift the blockages to the things that matter most.

Back to the near death experience. I have made a positive change in health as well as loving and living life more fully. Quitting smoking over three months ago (hopefully for the last time!) was the best thing I could've done for myself and for the ones I love. To live to see my future grandchildren, and who knows? Maybe someday I will have more children in the future. :) You never know. But a couple of days ago I had an allergic reaction to something, still not sure what the reaction was to, but woke up with my face swelled up like a red blueberry and covered in a rash. My eyes were almost swelled shut so Amber took me to the hospital. After seeing the doctor he ordered a shot in the hip and while waiting for the shot to kick in I could feel my throat swell more and more. The allergic reaction kept escalating, then finally I could feel some relief. My throat wasn't as swollen and breathing became easier.

What if Amber hadn't taken me to the hospital when she did? What if I had decided to stick it out and ignore it? The doctor gave me an epi-pen (an anaphylaxis shot kit to carry with me) and said if it happened again, use it and call an ambulance and do not wait! He was very serious and truthfully it scared me.

I have had a close encounter with lightening, and of course the close calls with stupid drivers, now this. It seems it's time to improve my quality of life now. I've come this far and it feels awesome. Now I'm almost a vegetarian, don't smoke, live happier and love happily, now the work and income aspect needs to improve. It will just take some work and some first steps. Life's too short to not be doing what you love while spending time with the ones you love.

Who knows what will happen. All I know is if no steps are taken to get out of my own rut I have no one to blame but myself. And all things are possible and many things are possible all at once. One doesn't have to sacrifice happiness in one area to gain it in another.

More meditation, more walks, more relaxing and less stressing about things that don't matter.

One step at a time...